The Starbucks mermaid has always held a special appeal and fascination for the millions of customers who patronize this global coffee chain, having become the iconic symbol of one of the most widely recognized brands in the world. She has been swimming subliminally in the collective consciousness for a long time, yet until now, no one has engaged the sexuality of this enigmatic sea-goddess so provocatively or explicitly as Brian Baxter does in this audacious account of intimate interspecies relations—told with a splash!

My Starbucks Mermaid ventures boldly where no man or woman has gone before—into the mystical deeps with a seductive siren who promises pleasures even more compelling than caffeine. Though many suspected that the Starbucks mermaid had a wild side, who really knew that she was a secret wanton, a tantalizing temptress harboring her own yearnings and desires, or that she would part her fins for just the right guy. The story shifts from the sensual to the subversive to the sublime, making an improbable love affair as real as any other for all its slippery implausibility.

Both poetic and perverse, My Starbucks Mermaid is sure to provoke and entertain readers who are prepared to shed their inhibitions and take an imaginative plunge with the world’s most celebrated maritime maiden.

“And I always assumed I was the only guy having sexual fantasies about the Starbucks mermaid. Thank you, Brian Baxter! I no longer feel like a total freak—though I can’t say I’m all that happy about sharing her with somebody else.” —Daniel Berg

“I actually did have sex with a real mermaid when I was in the Navy, back in 1987. At least, I think I did. I was pretty drunk at the time!” —Jay Pollock

“I don’t understand why some men get so obsessed with mermaids. But then again, I don’t know why anyone would become obsessed with the Kardashians.” —Connie Hayes

“Brian Baxter, now you’ve done it! After reading My Starbucks Mermaid, every time I see that logo, I have carnal thoughts. I confessed this to my priest, and he told me to say a bunch of Hail Marys. This didn’t help; the carnal thoughts persist...” —Mike Corrigan

“As mermaid stories go, this is one of the best I’ve seen. It really got me going.” —Lawrence Dean

“After he’d had his way with her and she swam away, I felt a deep despair. ‘Don’t be sad,’ I felt like saying. ‘There are lots of fish in the sea.’” —Holly Marin